one two three fourrrrnication!
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
