What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize