Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
He shit in the fireplace
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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