I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
