I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
