i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
