thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
