Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
