I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
