If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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