do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
