i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
