my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
