we're blogging at a bar
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Randomize
