Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
