just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
We're too hungover to prance.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
