what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize