I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
