just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
