Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize