Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
