I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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