It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
