DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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