she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
