so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
