What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
