last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
