We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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