I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
