Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
