i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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