So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
