I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
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