I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
