Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize