when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Randomize
