let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
What drink are we having for lunch?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
