I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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