You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Randomize