this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
