just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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