Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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