"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Randomize