watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
