why didn't you poke me back
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
