so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Still dying that you shit outside
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
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