Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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