yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
