Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize