Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I didn't notice because vodka
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
